#metoo

I have to admit that this message scared me a little bit.  I don't normally preach on David and Bathsheba.  It's one of those stories that we tell in Vacation Bible School, that we tell to kids (that's where I learned it) but we have to gloss over the things that really happen.  This is, at best, a very uncomfortable story.

It becomes even more uncomfortable when we combine it with what we're facing as a society today.  The #metoo movement has been growing, and we are beginning to have serous discussions about what acceptable behavior looks like, and call out those who commit truly awful acts against others.  It has been a slow process, but we're getting there.

This becomes the important question for us as people of faith.  David occupies a place in our faith that few others ever reach, and few are ahead of him.  What do we do with someone like David in light of what takes place in the story of David and Bathsheba.

The first thing is that we have to know is where to start the story. Many times, when we tell stories like this, we start where we think we should start to tell the story, probably close to the time when all of the important characters get together for the first time.  Other times, we start where we've always started in telling a particular story.

That's not always a good thing.  That leads us to compartmentalizing stories and missing important pieces of things that are happening.  This is true of the story of David and Bathsheba.  If we don't start it in the right place, then we are lead to having bad assumptions about some of the people involved.  This story starts in 2 Samuel 11, and continues from there.  We need to start the story in vs. 1.

The important piece of information we get here, and that is crucial to the story, comes at the end.  "David remained in Jerusalem."  This is key.  For the sequence of events that follow, this is David's first sin.

Remember, David is a war time king.  This wouldn't have been unusual because most of the kings in that time were the same way.  We're reminded of this in Chapter 7,  For David not to go to war is a mistake.  That is one of his main responsibilities.  This opens David up to his next sinful choice.  It doesn't make him vulnerable to it, we are all vulnerable to sin, but it sets up the next situation where David can choose to sin or not.

As the story goes, David is on the roof of his palace.  This would have been normal.  There were probably lots of folks on the tops of their homes.  But David sees one person in particular.  He sees Bathsheba who is bathing on her roof.  This also would have been normal.  In fact, she was probably taking a ritual bath because she had just finished her period.  Levitical law would have told her to do this.  She was doing nothing wrong here.

Here's where we need to dispel some myths.  None of this is Bathsheba's fault.  She did not seduce David, she did not entice him.  She did not have an affair with David. I mention that one because that is the middle ground compromise that some will go for, because it "takes two to tango."  That is also wrong.  This isn't even adultery, because that also suggests that Bathsheba was culpable in some way.  She had no choice.

David sends messengers to get her, or a better translation, "to take her."  They bring her back to his palace, he forces himself on her, and she gets pregnant.  None of this is Bathsheba's fault.  This is all on David.  I'm glad that as we tell the story, we don't hear much more about Bathsheba.  This story isn't about her, and she is not, and should not, be the bad guy here.  That is David.  This story is about David and his sins, and how he has to get through it.

David sins a third time when he tries to cover everything.  He hatches an elaborate plot to try and get Uriah, Bathsheba's husband to come home and seemingly get his wife pregnant.  It doesn't work.  Then David sins a fourth time when he has Uriah killed. Finally David sins a fifth time when he marries Bathsheba, again in an attempt to cover everything up.  To recap:

This is what David has done.  How is he still a person that we revere as a part of our faith?  These are not the actions of a Godly man, of a man who is after God's own heart.  How does he come through with his reputation?

The most important thing is that he is confronted with what's he done.  In the first part of Chapter 12, the prophet Nathan gives the biggest verbal beat down to David that we have in the Old Testament, and arguably through all of Scripture. If that wasn't enough, looking towards the end of Chapter 12, Joab makes it clear to David that if he doesn't come back out and do what he's supposed to do, as King and leader of the army, then Joab will take control.  This isn't an idle threat on Joab's part, and David knows that if he loses the army, he loses his kingdom.

David figures out that he has sinned, and sinned in an awful way.  He takes to heart what he is told, and he repents, but it isn't an easy repentance where he just says I'm sorry.  Psalm 51 is David's repentance.

When I read this now, I do so with David's frantic hope for forgiveness in mind.  David is a man of faith, and he knows he can be forgiven, but he also knows how bad he was and he is unsure.  This is key, because David knows how bad it was, he also knows that the fallout and cleanup is going to be just as bad.

This is what happens.  What David has done effects the rest of his reign as king, and it effects the next generation, and arguably the generations after that.  They are dealing with the fallout and cleanup from what David has done.  He is forgiven, but his sin set into motion other things and he had to deal with all of that.  And he does deal with it.  How does he get through it?

The first thing is to admit wrongdoing.  David tries to cover it up, but it doesn't work.  Eventually he has to face it.  That leads to the second point, don't deflect or make excuses.  This is what is happening when others try to put the blame on Bathsheba.  It doesn't work, and it isn't right.  Also, the good he does doesn't outweigh the bad (another common deflection).  Sin isn't transactional like that.  This takes us to the next point.  Don't go overboard in accepting repentance.  Doing that leads to empty apologies and expectations that the conflict has been taken care of.  All that really does is lead to the person who committed the sin not actually facing what they've done, and more pain for the victims.  To find resolution after sin takes time, and it will be messy and complicated and painful.  We can't skip that part.

This is the moment where we take this and know that this is why as a nation we are still dealing with the effects of slavery, even over 100 years from the end of the Civil War.  Resolution takes time, and the more people and time involved in the sin, the longer it takes to cleanup, especially when for several generations we didn't want to face the problems.  This is also the reason why victims in the #metoo movement might take several decades before they come forward.  Resolution isn't easy, nor should it be.

But here is the good news.  Anything can be overcome.  This is true both for the victim and victimizer.  This is why we can find comfort in David's words in Psalm 51.  We know, even better than David did, that we have a God who forgives, never gives up on us, and will lead us forward through the sin that has happened.  God doesn't promise that it will be easy, but he does promise that he'll be there with us.

It can be overcome.  The fallout can be taken care of, but we can't move it on our timetable.  God knows how long it will take to do it right, not just for us to do the right thing.  Even at the end of the story of David and Bathsheba, there wasn't a happily ever after, but they did find their place.

They live in a very different world that we do now.  They both had their own roles to play, but they figured it out.  David repented and overcame what he'd done.  Bathsheba healed and became an important person in her own right.  Their relationship would always bear the scars of what had happened, but they could find a new place to be, so they could go forward.

This is our hope as people of faith.  We live in a world that struggles with conflict, but we can (and should) provide a better way.  This is a way that helps us to get through the conflict, not by trying to make it go away, but by working through it, knowing it can be done because God goes with us.